Nursery security, off duty
Thug Baby
Pacifier in. Sunglasses up. Hallway under control.
House Rules
He works one room at a time: hold the rug, inspect the snacks, and keep every squeaker below wake-up volume.
Quiet Authority
One stare settles the squeaky-toy aisle before anyone wakes.
Snack Discipline
Biscuits are inspected, counted, then inspected again for crumbs.
Nap Resistant
Bedtime is treated as a suggestion from junior management.
After Lights-Out
At 8:03 every night, Thug Baby takes the carpet route from the couch to the snack cabinet. The shades stay up because the ceiling light is disrespectful. The chain is ceremonial, the pacifier is operational, and the bone tag grants unrestricted hallway access. Any vacuum entering his district receives one long look and a supervised retreat.
Known Habits
The routine is simple enough to chart and strict enough to survive a dropped cracker.
Thug Baby
Bedtime remains under negotiation.